Existence is Hard.
Sometimes being being a human is really hard. If it feels like a lot of work to take care of yourself, that’s because it is. The amount of effort it takes to simply care for your body can be exhausting. Get enough sleep, strength train, take walks, get outside, eat vegetables, limit sugar, limit alcohol, see your friends, be creative, manage stress, keep your space clean and organized, blah, blah, blah. Doing all of that on top of working and for some of us, caring for families can feel impossible. Our modern lives are built in opposition to our biology, so caring for your body is extra hard because it’s not built into your day. In fact, what we do for work can often hinder our health. So many of us are working incredibly hard to financially survive in this world. Financial stress can feel crippling because it affects our sense of safety. The systems we live under that make it hard to survive can leave you feeling helpless and hopeless. Not to mention the existential dread and grief you might be feeling when you see what is happening in the world. Taking care of yourself can feel silly when the world is on fire. You may find yourself trying so hard only to still feel like you’re drowning. That can leave you feeling defeated, burnt out, desperate, disappointed, exhausted, apathetic, depressed, and anxious.
So what’s the cure for this painful existence? I wish I had one. I wish I had one prescription to give us all. For starters, just let yourself feel your feelings. Let yourself grieve. It’s ok to grieve the world we live in. It’s heavy, let your grief be witnessed. It’s important to stick to the basics when it all feels too hard. Similar to any other living being, you have certain basic needs that must be met, such as sleep, movement, and nutrition. Don’t you dare try to do it perfectly. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, community is the answer. Hold each other, feed each other, play together, cry together, just be together. Be honest with yourself about what you need and then ask for it. The number one rule though is self-compassion. Don’t add fuel to the fire in your nervous system by creating another threat through self-hatred and judgement. Existence is hard sometimes, so be gentle with yourself.
Questions to ponder.
What is one need that is not getting met right now?
How can you meet that need?
What is one kind, gentle, compassionate thing to say to yourself?
