Who are you?
It’s a simple question with a very complex answer. You’ll hear me often say that identity is slippery. So many things influence your identity. Some parts of your identity are pretty locked in, but some things can change a lot over time with life experience. In our culture, we often associate who we are with what we do and the roles we play in our lives. This might include your career, your role in a family (like mother), or role in your community. I like to think of the answer to this question like a beautiful detailed painting. There’s the up front image as a whole and once you look closer, you begin to see a kaleidoscope of art. Different details, colors, textures, and shadows. The longer you look, the more you find. So when asked, “who are you?,” it’s a novel, not a short story.
The components of your own identity painting or novel are never ending. It will include your values, morals, ethics, and what your integrity looks like. Your personality will greatly shape who you are. Gender and sexuality are pieces of this masterpiece. The way you express yourself is part of who you are, your style, your hair, how you communicate. How you relate to others influences you deeply. As social animals who absorb a lot from those around us, the people in your life have more say in who you are than you might think. Hobbies and interests can shape who you are. The character traits you practice and embody are beautiful details in the painting of your life. Experiences that shape your world view or your spiritual beliefs are major influences here as well. You will spend your whole life creating the masterpiece painting that is you and it will be a masterpiece. If you’ve ever painted (we’re not talking about watercolors here), you know it takes time and patience. Old strokes and additions must dry before adding more. And you can always add more or paint over a section that doesn’t fit the whole anymore. Paintings are never perfect and that’s what makes them unique and incredible, just like you. So take a step back and admire the work in progress that you are.
Questions to ponder.
What are three ways you could answer this question that have nothing to do with what you do for work or a role you play?
What are five values that influence how you show up in the world?
What are three traits you love about yourself?
